Express method of building bridges

In today’s communication there are several ways to establish contact and develop effective relationships. One way is to express a special form of respect, recognition or admiration by giving compliments, which is widely considered to the basic element of etiquette. Compliments differ from flattery and praise in that they rely on facts and tend not to make the other side feel higher or lower.

Compliments have a unique magic power which addresses the most important human need — the need for positive emotions. When we give a compliment, two thing happen: we deliver joy and we become associated with pleasure. Moreover, as the Roman poet Publius Syrus said: “We are interested in other people when they are interested in us”, hence the the compliment is an excellent tool to attract the attention of another person and to be included into their circle.

In our academy, we teach and train the detail and subtleties of the art of complimenting. There are several techniques of giving compliments, such as, classic stroking (Super!, It’s wonderful!, Top class!); compliments of double action (classic stroking plus the Self-message); comparison with an idol (You do it like…); question-exclamation (How do you do it!) and seeking advice. There are also various cliches that produce a hypnotic effect, such as “I know that you …”; “I felt… once I saw you …”; “I am experiencing this only with you for the first time …”.

If you wish your compliment to sound natural, base it on reality, try to observe your interlocutor, gather the information about him/her, learn the manner of his/her communication, habits and other distinctive features. When the reaction to a compliment may be unpredictable, you can incorporate tactics used by law enforcement, whereby we express a compliment on behalf of third party who our interlocutor respects: … said that you …” or “… recommended you as a …”.

I am often asked when to make a compliment? My advice is at the beginning and at the end of a conversation. First, at the beginning, because you immediately set up the interlocutor for pleasant emotions, which in turn elevates the communication to a positive level. Second, this is an excellent exercise for your self-awareness since the search for a realistic and personalized compliment activates your attention, Third, a compliment at the end of communication is done to leave a pleasant aftertaste, akin to perfume — you’re gone, but the fragrance lingers on. (By the way, the sense of smell is a separate topic in our training).

Finally, cultivating a new habit requires repetition — compliment as often as you can!

Intetested in becoming a Genius of Communication?

Get More for Your Budgetwith our special offers

Would you like to make your Genius of Communication training more proactive and productive?
To suit your needs we have designed three special offers, which include:

  • Daily Motivational Assignments for 49 days
  • An Itemized Personal Agenda with daily to-do list
  • Personal Coaching sessions
  • Access to the Webinar Series on Happy Relationships in Couples
  • Access to the Webinar Series on Effective Professional Relationships
  • Access to the Webinar Series on Favourable Parent-Child Relationships
  • At-Home Educational Cinema Reviews
  • 2-Day Intensive Group Workshop

Find the option that works best for you...

Learn more

Test YOURSELF

How good your communication skills are?

Start now

Our programs are for you if:
  • you are introverted and find it difficult to communicate;
  • you are building a new business and need to develop leadership skills;
  • you are ambitious and want to have an advantage over others;
  • you are tired of misunderstandings and confusions in communication;
  • you want to improve your status and play in the "big leagues";
  • you conduct negotiations and want to influence with more impact;
  • you are tired of being misunderstood and not accepted;
  • you are tired of loneliness and desire to build a healthy relationship;
  • you want to minimize challenges in communication and avoid conflicts;
  • you feel frustrated and anxious when meeting new people;
  • you need to strengthen your self-esteem and confidence;
  • you want to become a public figure and increase your influence;
  • you want to enjoy communication and be accepted in any company;
  • you agree that networking should be an integral part of your life.

Join the Discussion What subjects interest you?